Like candles in my wind

While gratuitously mentioning that today is my birthday, I leave you with some random thoughts before mapping out where I can find free birthday food and drink to stuff into my face throughout the day (just like my favorite former sports columnist, Mitch Albom). Think of each thought as a candle on a cake (except if I typed a thought for every year of my life, you'd have a hell of a lot to read).

♦ For the Tigers' sake, it's a good thing women can only give birth once every nine months. Detroit needs Juan Uribe to get back in the White Sox lineup. What if the birth of his son is the determining factor in the AL Central race this season?

♦ So let's think about this: If Alex Cintron (whose name makes me think of vodka) and the Tigers' bullpen entered Thunderdome ("Two men enter, one man leaves!" Or would it be three men in this case? Whatever.), Cintron would be the one walking out victoriously to accept our finest meats and cheeses, and hear the lamentations of our women. How did that happen? Dude is a Tigers killer. Two nights in a row! He owns the Detroit bullpen.

♦ And for those of you who read both of my blogs (thank you if you do), yes, that's the second time this week I've used that movie reference. Hey, it's a good one. Even if I haphazardly slapdashed it with another movie reference in the previous thought. Did I mention it was my birthday today?

♦ As soon as I read that the Tigers drafted Ronnie Bourquin of (the) Ohio State (university) on Tuesday, I wondered what Mr. Big Ten Hardball, Brian, thought of the pick (along with the other players Detroit selected. Now I know, thanks to Beyond Boxscores. (The man has two blogs. Stay with me.)

♦ Speaking of the baseball draft, have you heard about Future Draft Day Legend Brandon Morrow yet? Somebody get this kid a Bluetooth headset.

♦ Would I lose your respect as a sports fan tomorrow morning if I opted to watch Season 2 of Rescue Me, rather than Game 1 of the NBA Finals? I watched the first disc of the DVD set last night and am totally hooked. Tommy Gavin is the man.

♦ The Chicago Sun-Times echoed a thought that occurred to me when this Jason Grimsley news hit the fan: Isn't Grimsley the same guy who swapped out Albert Belle's corked bat after he'd been busted for using it? Trouble seems to find this guy like batting gloves to pine tar. (Grimsley's affidavit can be found here, via Deadspin.)

♦ Remember the days when everyone assumed it was only hitters who took steroids and other performance-enhancing drugs?

Carry on with your bad selves. And, as always, thank you very much for stopping by. Barring a forehead-crushing hangover, I'll be back tomorrow.