This off-season thing isn't going well

I'm hoping that Dale Davis was causing trouble in Miami by trying to steal the Larry O'Brien trophy and bring it back up to Detroit.

Or maybe someone said that Alonzo Mourning was better than him. I don't know. I'm just trying to understand. Help us help you, Dale (if that is, in fact, your real name).

Disorderly conduct? Resisting arrest? Assault? Shouting obscenities at officers? And did Davis really have to be subdued with a taser shot? (The Detroit News confirms this, reporting the shot "left small puncture marks on his chest and abdomen." That sounds like it hurts.)

Man. And you thought you were mad about the Pistons losing Big Ben to Chicago...

This would've been so much funnier if it was Darko.