Okay, it's not a slump

You can come down from the roof. Tell the women and children they're safe. We don't have to live off canned food and bottled water. The Detroit Pistons' two-game losing streak is over.

And it's a good thing for Ben Wallace. The poor guy probably needed lots of ice and ointment for all the welts he received, thanks to Mike Dunleavy's intricate hack-the-other-team's-suckiest-free-throw-shooter strategy. In a fine example of a man realizing his limitations, Ben deferred to Antonio McDyess, whose scoring ability forced the Clippers to try some other form of defense.

After hitting two key three-pointers that probably put the game away, Rasheed Wallace gave the stink-eye to his former coach in Portland, which was very likely related to his opinion of Dunleavy's defensive philosophy (which worked so well for the Blazers against the Shaq-led Lakers, you might remember). What did #36 say to the Clippers' coach?

"Obscenities," according to Chris McCosky's game story in the Detroit News. Welcome to yet another episode of "Why We Love 'Sheed."

And now, with a little All-Star break thrown in for needed rest, the Pistons can focus on the Charles Bronson portion of their schedule. It's time for some revenge. After Orlando and Miami, Detroit can look for a little payback against New Jersey, Atlanta, and Indiana. And what's that you say? Each of those games are at the Palace? Ooooh, I like revenge flicks.

Speaking of that All-Star break, have you heard the latest rumors? Both Detroit newspapers cite a New York Daily News report that Chauncey Billups, Rip Hamilton, and Ben Wallace have been named to the All-Star roster, the remainder of which will be announced tonight on TNT (They know drama!). And a fourth Piston could be on his way to Houston if David Stern decides to name 'Sheed or Tayshaun Prince (who's scored 51 points in his last two games, by the way) as a replacement for the injured Jermaine O'Neal.

What does all this mean? We're going to be fine, people. Spend time with your significant other. It's okay to open up, to give and receive love as you used to. Treat yourself to a nice meal tonight. Your food will surely taste good now. Have a glass of wine, while you're at it. Those tannins are breathing again. Sit back and relax, because all is right with the world once more. The Pistons two-game losing streak is over.