Sweaty Men Endeavors

The sports blog with the slightly gay name

Friday, December 30, 2005

New Year's Day massacre?

So really, how ugly will Sunday's Lions-Steelers game be? I'm envisioning something like the scene in Revenge of the Sith when the Jedi Knights are mowed down, one by one. Or maybe the end of Bonnie and Clyde.

Remember when the Lions used to win games like this? They used to beat teams you wouldn't expect them to beat. Of course, they'd lose to, say, the Arizona Cardinals in the same season. But they could be counted on to beat the Cowboys or 49ers (when they were good), which is probably what sucked us all into the hellish covenant we're trapped in as Lions fans.

Wow, I miss those days.

▪▪ Add Damien Woody to the "If you don't like it here, get the #$@% out" pile. On Wednesday, he said he never would've signed with the Lions two years ago if he'd known how dysfunctional the organization was.

$#!+, Damien - we could've told you that. Going from the cream of the NFL (the Patriots) to the crap? How did you think that was going to work out for you? But we figured your ridiculous salary ($11.5 million in 2004) was enough to make you happy.

▪▪ Want a good laugh before the holiday weekend? Check out this headline from today's Detroit News: Jauron is ready to continue as Lions' coach after season.

Is he $@#%ing kidding? Dude, if you don't have time to update your resume right now, I'd be happy to do it for you. How about we put "Named Jeff Garcia starting quarterback" right at the top, and see how that works with future employers?

I know this is one of those silly things that fans often say, but if Dick Jauron is the Detroit Lions coach next season, that could be it for me. I might just walk away. I can't take another year of this #@$%ing $#!+. Name one thing he's done to prove he deserves to keep that job. And if he's popular with the players, that's even more reason to drop him off at a bus station next week.

Deep breaths. Deep breaths. Peaches, flowers, sunshine. My pain will end on Sunday.


  • At December 30, 2005 2:34 PM, Anonymous benny said…

    Jauron as the head coach for the Lions next season? You might as well start writing "Fire Jauron" with those "Fire Millen" signs. He's done nothing to really prove he's worthy of being a great head coach. I don't see him being the man for next season.

    As for Daimien Woody? Anyone could have told him he signed a deal with the devil by signing with the Lions. As we all know, it was ALL and I mean ALL about the money.

  • At December 30, 2005 3:06 PM, Blogger Ian C. said…

    Just as Alan Trammell was let go the day after the baseball season ended, the first thing the Lions should do on Monday is announce that Jauron won't be back.

    Otherwise, I think you might finally begin to see the empty seats at Ford Field that everyone has been threatening.

    Could the Lions trade Woody for Miguel Tejada right now? ;)


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