Lighten up, Francis

As regular readers of my mother ship blog know, I love children. They're our future. We can teach them well, and then let them lead the way. But our future is apparently in trouble. Because somewhere along the line, we forgot to teach the children how to take a joke. And if you can't take a joke - especially when you've set yourself up for playful derision and ridicule - maybe you're not ready to get along in modern society. Perhaps you should consider a career in the military. Or the monastery.

Have you heard the story of Joshua Vannoy, a 17-year-old Pennsylvania high school student who decided it would be funny to wear a Denver Broncos jersey (No. 7, John Elway) to school, only to be "dehumanized" by his Steelers fan teacher? The educator apparently made his student sit on the floor of the classroom and asked the rest of the class to pelt the young man with balls of crumpled paper.

(Photo via AP)

It should be pointed out, however, that a test was scheduled during this particular class period, so perhaps the teacher's judgment could be called into question a bit. Maybe not the best idea when a kid's worried about taking a test. But maybe he was trying to lighten the mood on a tense day. The teacher, John Kelly, insists that "it was silly fun," and "can't believe [Vannoy] was upset."

"If he felt uncomfortable, then that's a lesson," he said to the Denver Post. "That's what [the class] is designed to do." The class, by the way, is an honors course on ethnic relations.

Vannoy claims he was so shaken and humiliated by the experience that he left 20 questions on the 60-question exam blank. (I'm betting he'll get to re-take that test.) He also says that he wants out of Kelly's class because the teacher is "going to want revenge somehow," now that this incident has reached the media.

Say, how do you think the story reached the media? I found three different articles on this story, with three different pictures of Vannoy posing in his Broncos jersey for cameras. In each of them, Vannoy has just the right look of persecution and humiliation.

I don't suppose it ever occurred to the kid that his teacher might be joking. Having a few friends who work in education, I'm all for respecting the authority of your instructor. But c'mon - telling the kid to sit on the floor? Calling him a "stinkin' Broncos fan"? Asking his classmates to throw wads of paper at him? Does that sound serious? That never struck him as vaguely humorous? A bit goofy? Never mind that he was wearing a jersey from the Broncos, the team playing the hometown Steelers for a chance to go to the Super Bowl, and knew that might open him up to a joke or two. The teacher wearing a Steelers jersey might have been another tip-off.

How about just saying, "No, I'd rather take my test" and laughing it off?

Plus, we're talking about a 17-year-old kid. He's not too far from going into the real world. You think he won't be teased when he wears a Broncos jersey in a Steelers town? Check out this story from Deadspin. A guy shrink-wrapped his co-worker's cubicle and draped a Steelers flag over it! It only gets worse (and much more creative). So he might as well learn to laugh. Or keep the sports jerseys in his closet. Life's too short, man.

(Image from "Pearls Before Swine" ©2005 Stephen Pastis/ Dist. by UFS, Inc.)